PatsPropaganda

An Independent Patriots Blog

Schwag Hunt

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: Patriots Tree Face

Hard core fans are sure to want this? Uh, sorry guys but no, I don’t need to freak the crap out of people in my backyard with a weird Mr. Potatoe Head face wearing a Patriots hat. What’s the theory behind this? That the tree not only a person but also a Patriots fan? Do any other teams have this? Could we make another tree in my yard a Jets Tree Face and then chop it down? The Tree Face just raises more questions than answers, and with each one I only want it more and more.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-patriots-tree-face-hard/

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: Hey, NFLShop.com, Burn Everything Patriots Super Bowl 42! Related

I don’t get it, is there a single Patriots fan who wants to be reminded of the most disappointing loss in Patriots history? You know what comes to mind when I see the Super Bowl 42 Logo? Bad things. Eli in the grasp. Brady on his ass. Tyree’s Miracle. Burress shooting himself in the leg (yes, I replaced that memory for his touchdown memory. It almost works.). So I implore NFLShop.com to remove any Patriots-Super Bowl 42 related schwag. You’ll never sell any of it, even this poster for less than five bucks, and in fact, you might actually cause people to click away in disgust.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-hey-nflshopcom-burn/

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: Sexy Patriots Jedi

Horrible Patriots schwag isn’t just for the fellas, as this piece is just as bad as anything we’ve posted (though certainly far more enjoyable to look at it). Look, I get the fan experience as much as anyone, but that doesn’t mean you need your fanship creeping into all areas of your life, like the Pro Toast and breakfast, or this Sexy Patriots Jedi outfit and the beach and/or bedroom. I love the Pats, but they really don’t turn me on in that way. If anything the logo’s gonna take my brain elsewhere and that could cause problems.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-sexy-patriots-jedi-horrible/

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: Slipper Sneakers

I’m not gonna lie, I kinda want these since they’re pretty much the most ridiculous things you could ever put on your feet short of clown shoes. But I can’t think of a more appropriate footwear for morning game preparations. We’re talking cooking, drinking, and of course blogging. Your feet would be in good hands with these bad boys.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-slipper-sneakers-im-not/

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: Complete Your Belichick Halloween Costume

You’ve decided to be Bill Belichick for Halloween. You bought a $75 hoodie and cut the sleeves off just below the elbows. You’ve got a pair of khakis and maybe even some Patriots sneakers but something’s missing and it’s this hilarious inflatable coaches headset. Sure,you could get a real headset but it will A) cost more than $12 and B) be hot and bulky at your halloween party.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-complete-your-belichick/

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: The Logo Vomit Hawaiian Shirt

As opposed to the other schwag hunts where we’ve found single logos blown up and put on the back of jackets, this shirt takes the opposite approach. In fact, it even makes up logos (see the Patriots logo that you’ve never seen before).  It’s like all the Patriots logos got together and had an ogry. I wonder if the shirt comes with a warning because I worry that it might cause seizures.

The best part? It’s $60.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-the-logo-vomit-hawaiian/

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Patriots Schwag Hunt: Giant Helmet Jacket

This sweet jacket is on sale for $61, down from $99 so get over to NFLShop.com and make a purchase. Personally I just find this jacket lazy, whoever designed it just decided to throw the huge helmet patch on the back. Why not just buy a helmet instead and wear that? Who does this jacket appeal to? People who love helmets but hate wearing things on their head I guess.

https://www.patspropaganda.com/patriots-schwag-hunt-giant-helmet-jacket-this/