townienews:

From The “How Come It Took You Guys So Fahkin’ Long To Make This?” Department Comes…THE RAINMAKER.

Yes, it sucks on rye, with stale chips and a sour pickle shaped like a dick (a dickle) that Edelmania! gets hurt JUST when we’d made a special holiday shirt to celebrate his ascension to Pats prominence. Oh, it sucks many more hard-boiled footballs for the Pats because he was killing it on special AND regular teams (BTFW – can we call them “return teams” and not “special teams” from now on? “special teams” just has a connotation that kinda, well…yeah. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! Not negative. Just, you know, just…yeah.) ANYFAHKINWAY…the Edelmania! shirts are on hold, hoping he comes back in Foxboro football freak shape next fall (and refunds issued to all who purchased). And what to do with all the blank shirt lying around? Cover them in rain. Yup, a loss for one is a gain for another. We’d wanted to do this shirt for some time now. Sad that we got around to it when someone else went down. Noentheless it’s a wicked pissah kinda killah shirt that is available ASAMFP for only $15 at the Townie News Store (free parking!). And yes, the shirt will ship in time for Hernando to rain in all his Patriotic glory al over you, or under the Christmas tree of another die-hahd Patsperson.

Heal well, Edelmania! Bring the rains, Hernando! GFY, Texans! And let’s go Pats!

More soon right here from this very WGFY station.