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Coin Flip-gate: Are the Patriots cheating the coin toss too?

September 30, 2015 by Mike Dussault

The coin toss to determine first possession in football dates all the way back to 1892, at the very start of the game itself. While the procedure has evolved in the last 123 years, it remains one of original tenets of the game of football.

But in the last year a trend has emerged that calls into question the integrity of this invaluable opening moment of a football game. The coin toss was expected to be a fair chance for each team to get their choice at the start of the game – whether to receive the ball, choose a side of the field to defend or to defer possession until the second half.

Each team should have a 50/50 chance at winning, but that’s not the case for teams playing the New England Patriots. Since the start of the 2014 regular season the Patriots have won and deferred on 17 of 22 coin flips. In those 17 games the Patriots are 15-2! 

While the odds of winning a coin flip should be 50 percent, the Patriots are somehow winning at a rate of 77.3%. Inconceivable!

The coins are supplied by the referees and that points a direct line toward the NFL if the refs are using weighted coins to help the Patriots win the tosses. However the number of “deferrals” is closely split between home (ten games) and away (seven games), and since the away team calls heads or tails one might wonder if even the opponents themselves are in on giving the Patriots an unfair advantage over… themselves.

Or perhaps the simplest answer is strategic magnets placed in the Patriots’ captain’s equipment by Bill Belichick and Ernie Adams, specifically calibrated to make the coins do what the Patriots want them to. No one is better at post-snap adjustments than New England, why should we think any different about their post-toss adjustments?

According to some random coin toss probability finder I found on google the chances of the Patriots correctly hitting 17 of 22 flips is 1 in 159! So are we to assume that the Patriots not only dominate the NFL but probability science as well!?

As we know from all the numerous anonymous unsubstantiated claims against the Patriots, there’s a chance that they might cheat in a way that all other teams try but only the Patriots get blamed for. This is just the latest example of someone who is outraged (me) applying causation to correlation because I want the national media to pay attention to me and I hate the Patriots because they beat my team a bunch of times. And Tom Brady is smug. And Bill Belichick is mean.

This issue should be investigated by Don Van Natta Jr., Ted Wells, The Warren Commission, Magnum PI, Inspector Gadget and anyone else who has flawless integrity and is willing to publish unprovable dirty laundry at the behest of ESPN and their stable of former players who had their seasons ended at various points by Bill Belichick and the Patriots.

The coin toss is sacred and the Patriots can’t be allowed to get away with this any longer!!!!!!

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: deflategate, new england patriots, satire

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