I only have the energy for one take today because The Oldest Huckster in Boston threw out a doozy of a tweet.
Hot Take:
Roethlisberger has surgery today. So once again, we are assured Pats have no tests before playoffs. #TomatoCans
— Dan Shaughnessy (@Dan_Shaughnessy) October 17, 2016
King of the Strawman argument, DickButter Shaughnessy, pulls out his classic “tomato cans” analogy to describe the rest of the Pats schedule. His columns and hot takes have become the laziest game of madlibs.
Here’s the formula: [Thing that is good for team’s chances to win this week]. Actually it’s bad you idiot because [uninformed, but intensely guttural opinion] [then always] #tomatocans
Here let’s try one, something that is good? Home field. Okay how about: The Patriots have home field advantage in the playoffs. Actually it’s bad you idiot because they won’t be tested on the road until the Super Bowl. #TomatoCans
I might have to rewrite the formula because it sounds so stupid when you say it out loud—
He said that?! For real? I was just making a – When did he say it? 2014, like when the Patriots won the Super Bowl or how it’s always confusing because the season is played over two years and you mean like the 2014-2015 season? No? The year they won?!! Woooooooow. That’s just doubling down on stupid. Let’s examine the wall of Tomato Cans.
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