PatsPropaganda

An Independent Patriots Blog

Best/Worst in Weekly Patriots Links -1/14 (Divisional Playoffs Edition)

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“You come to Foxboro, it’s gonna be snowing, it’s gonna be cold. Come on in here. We still play, and we win. That’s what we do.”- Teddy Bruschi

The road to Houston starts with the Texans and goes through route 1 tonight. Brockstar and the band are in town looking for an encore after beating up on the bruised and battered Raiders last weekend. With a comical and outlandish 16 point spread, it’s clear who Vegas likes in this one. Matt Dolloff (CBS Boston Contributor) sides with the house, stating:

There are more than enough former Patriots on the Texans staff to understand how tough of a game Saturday will be, but way too many for them to foster the kind distaste for New England that’s needed to have a chance at pulling the upset at Gillette. The same reason that O’Brien won’t get enough out of his team on Saturday is the same reason Belichick will be calling off the dogs by the end of the third quarter.

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Patriots Gameplan: AFCDG vs. Houston Texans

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The playoffs are here. Finally. Yes, it feels like most of what occurred in between watching the Patriots walk off the field in Denver after squandering a golden chance at another Super Bowl appearance to now was a bit of an annoying, meaningless blur. Brady’s suspension, Garoppolo, Brissett, a bunch of forgettable games, one or two good ones, losing Gronk, finishing strong and boom, January is here.

This is when things matter. This is when the legacies of Brady and Belichick can take a step forward. This is what we the fans live for. And here come the 9-7 Houston Texans, the biggest underdogs in an NFL playoff game since the turn of the century. Super Bowl betting is very much in the Patriots favor and this one isn’t all that scary.

Which is kinda scary.

It’s a far cry from the Colts in 2004 or even these same Texans in 2012. We kinda like these guys. Vrabel, Wilfork, RAC, BOB…But the Texans are standing in the Patriots’ way of a record sixth-straight conference championship game appearance, so throttle them we must.

Here’s the gameplan to survive and advance at the expense of some old pals.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mN9f7oXM-U

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Coffin Corner: Spoilers Alert!

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Every NFL season during the Roger Goodell reign has become an absurdist melodrama that would shame the writing staffs of Downton Abbey, Days of Our Lives and WWE. This year’s episodes included:

The Suspension. The Jimmy G Tour. The Thumb. Goodell’s Pathological Addiction to Protecting Pathological Abusers. I have no idea how he screwed this up, but I’m glad the Giants have correctly identified Odell Beckham as the Giant most in need of chiding. “The Belichick Letter,” which reminded me of the great “Cheevers letters” Seinfeld episode. The “Tomato Can” tour, a Dan Shaughnessy tradition unlike any other. (“Heads, I win”; “Tails, I win” argument.  Shaughnessy’s such a talented writer who relies on hackery in an effort to be “right”. As if that matters.) Deflategate 2: Science And Procedure And Whatever. Walkie-Talkie thingee. (I understand the hypocrisy of the NFL, but I still don’t understand why I’m supposed to care about this. This is how the league should punish people for things that don’t affect the 22 players on the field.)

Deeeeeep breath…

The Year-Long Ratings Decline. The Cynical Touchback rule. LeGarrette Blount’s predictable 1,000-yard season. Patriots get too cute trying to bleed clock and end up losing to Seattle. Jeff Fisher’s paid vacation. Rex Ryan’s truck. Aaron Rodgers being treated like a God for correctly identifying the Packers upcoming soft schedule. (Where is Shaughnessy on this one?!) Jason Garrett following in a long line of mediocre coaches winning Coach of the Year. (In a decade this will look really bad, but he had a back-up QB win 13 games. I get it.) John Harbaugh complained a bunch. (Google “John Harbaugh complains.” It’s absolutely remarkable. He once complained at a player’s funeral to DeMaurice Smith talking about practice!)

But something about this season didn’t feel quite right. Almost like a network comedy that’s in a 5th or 6th season rut. The cast and writing staffs have become a bit hemmed in by their cast, each now slowly becoming more caricature than character. This season felt like that. Maybe that’s why most of the stories we got were like the third season of the O.C.’s Chrismukkah episode: Deflategate 2, Goodell goes Soft on Wife beaters, John Harbaugh complains about something that happened to him in grade school. Even Goodell never really seemed invested in this year’s tangential storylines, barely defending his atrocious handling of the league. Afraid to show his face as ratings declined. He barely lodged a single illogical pronunciations that went unchallenged by writers propped up by the league. No science to disprove. No tyrannical over-reliance on the word “Integrity.”

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Deep Dive Rewatch: Week 3 vs. Houston Texans

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVq4HxeN8K4

One of the advantages of taking on a playoff opponent in the regular season is that you get a great chance to self scout yourself before going into the matchup again. The good news for us, is we get to take a look at scheme, as well as players. The Patriots in particular are a much different team from the last matchup so lets go through and outline those differences.

Clearly, this team is not the same as they were in Week 3, and neither are the Texans after Brock Osweiler starting, being benched, and now starting again, or JJ Watts appearance, ineffectiveness, and disappearance. However, there is a lot to be gleaned from seeing this game, and obviously the Patriots are going to take a look at it also. Here are a few quick notes after looking at the game again:

First, and most importantly, can we wear these uniforms again? Seriously they’re fire. Okay okay, I’m watching.

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Which Hoodie Should Bill Belichick Wear vs. Texans?

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By now you should all know about the signature stat here at PatsPropaganda.com, a metric so advanced it has immeasurable effect on every single game. I am of course talking about the Bill Belichick Hoodie Database and the vital information it contains. Each playoff season I like to take a look back and figure out what BB should wear based on his history against a particular opponent and in that round of the playoffs.

This year, Belichick continued the trend of getting away from hoodies, preferring to stick with the “Hot” Jacket that came out in 2013. This season he raised his all-time record in the Hot jacket to 24-8, just eight games behind the gray Reebok Hoodie that Belichick made famous.

What should Belichick wear against the Texans? Let’s take a look…

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Pats Posits: It’s Go Time

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The Houston Texans will come to Foxborough for the second time this season for an AFC Divisional playoff game against the top-seeded Patriots. The Texans are littered with former Patriots, and the teams are now playing for the third time in two seasons. Plenty of familiarity.

I wanted to avoid having to take so many old friends out to the woodshed. But it has to be done and TFB and BB are just the two cold-hearted motherfuckers to do it.

In September it was Jacoby Brissett, who was injured and played through a thumb injury that would eventually land him on IR. The defense had their most complete game of the season, pitching their first shutout since 2009.

The playoffs are here. The opponent is set. It’s go time in the Posits…

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Patriots Scouting Report: Houston Texans AFC Divisional Game

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With Miami losing today to Pittsburgh, we now know that it will be the Houston Texans coming to town to take on the top-seeded New England Patriots on Saturday night. While the Patriots did beat Houston 27-0 back in Week 3, it is hard to look at that game and find much insight into what either team plans to do this time around due to how greatly the Patriots have changed.

As a refresher, Jacoby Brissett was the starting quarterback, Rob Gronkowski had yet to be placed on IR and was making his season debut, Jamie Collins and Jonathan Freeny led the Patriots in tackles, Kyle Van Noy was a Lion, Rob Ninkovich was still suspended, and Dion Lewis and Dont’a Hightower were sidelined with injury. That being said, here is a in-depth overview of the Texans and their roster, position by position, so you can get to know the Patriots first playoff opponent!

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